The Scoreboard

That last post about my ring got me thinking about the people of Eugene and how their score is playing out. I decided to make a list of a few things purely for entertainment value. The people of Eugene do not owe me anything. I'm just putting it out there.

+1 point

• Marci who found my wedding ring.
• Joanie who helped me with my groceries.
• The sweet cashier at the grocery store who's always super nice to me.
• The Mormons. They have been helpful and amazing in so many ways.
• My nurses at the hospital when Chewie was born.
• Co-workers at my old job.
• Extreme hula hoopers. Pretty awesome stuff.
• The woman I saw full-out dancing while she was jogging.
• The person who puts up signs on streets that say, "Drive like you love everybody" and "Love your husband". They make me happy.

= +9 points!

-1 point

• The man who looked like Santa and literally almost ran me over when I was jogging. People who look like Santa should not do that.
• The lady who yelled at us when she was behind us in line at the drive-thru atm. That's what lines are lady. You have to wait.
• The person driving behind me who honked at me right when the light turned green. Relax guy. Just the drivers in general, but you get that everywhere.
• The woman at the gas station who freaked out at us because she had to wait for us to park so that she could leave.
• The pot smokers at the movie theater.
• The woman at the recycling center who told me she was thinking about getting an abortion. I'm against abortion in most cases, but c'mon. I feel that when your 34 and married and you have a surprise pregnancy, you go through with it.
• The teenagers who pretended to wail on some other kid when I drove by. I pulled over because I'm such a great person, but they were faking it and then they all ran away. Lesson: Don't help people on danger.
• When we were waiting to get into the aquatic center and Paco the chiuaua peed on our pool bag. The owner who saw it happen and knew we saw it happen did nothing.
• The public health nurse who guilt tripped me for not wanting to use cloth diapers or have a natural childbirth. Personal choices people!
• The guy who helped us open a bank account here and flat out told me what an idiot I was for not having a credit card yet, while in the same breath talking about how much debt he got into as a teen with a credit card. He was trying to be funny I guess, but pretty unprofessional. For the record, I finally grew up and got a credit card.

= -10 points!

These factor in too:

+ Randi

• I sometimes give bums money. That could also be a minus though. I don't necessarily think giving bums money is a great idea. There are bums on almost every corner downtown. Some get pretty creative with their signage. Yesterday I saw one that said: I'd rather be working. The other day I saw a guy holding up an imaginary sign. I wonder what he was trying to accomplish with that.
• I usually pick up our dogs poo

= +2 points?

- Randi

• Sometimes I don't pick up Leila's poo
• I got mad at a grocery teller once. Chewie was crying and he was going so slow! I feel really bad about it, and whenever I see him, I just want to give him a hug and say, "I'm sorry." Would that be weird?

= -2 points.

Well, it looks like the people of Eugene score a -1, and I cancel myself out. Neither of these are good scores. I basically don't contribute at all to my community! C'mon Eugenians! Let's you and I work together and make our city a happier place!