Who does my cereal box think I am?

I like sleep. I need at least 8 hours to be able to function well during the day. I also love sleeping in, but I fear I will never be able to do that again. Ah well, kids are worth it.

Lately I've been having trouble sleeping, so when I wake up in the morning I feel even more exhausted than usual. Alec found some online tips to help me sleep better, and some breakfast food ideas to get me energized in the morning. A couple of of the foods suggested are granola and nuts.

While at the store I came across some peanut butter granola. I love peanut butter! It's got peanuts and granola! Two birds with one stone.

The next morning I was excited to eat my energy food. I took a closer look at the box. I didn't notice how much it had to say when I bought it. I started reading. This granola is premium. It's saving the planet by making it's box size 10% smaller than it used to be, even though you're getting the same amount of granola. According to the box that's 1,000 trees per year and energy savings equal to 38 homes per year!

I kept reading. Uh oh, it's vegan. I haven't had much experience with vegan food, I've just had one bad experience. I bought a vegan cookie that just happened to be peanut butter. It looked delicious. I took a bite. It didn't taste peanut buttery, nor did it taste like a cookie. It was just bad. Not boding well for this granola.

I read on. It's organic. Well, that's great. Organic or not, it all tastes the same to me.

As I continued to read, things started getting personal. My granola was complimenting me!

It told me I'm a good person for recycling. Thank you!

It told me I look for local produce to buy, so that makes me a good person. Wait. I do? Well, I guess sometimes I do when I go to the farmer's market. Ok, cool.

It told me my bike helmet suits me. I don't even own a bike helmet! Nice!

My granola and I, together on the path to a more sustainable lifestyle. This has been a great morning so far.

But wait, I'm reading about how it's squeezed the same amount of cereal into a tighter fitting box and then it asks me if I've tried squeezing into my pants from college lately. Woah, hold on. Are you saying I'm fat? You don't even know me!

Then it goes on and on telling me about how great it is, exploring new energy sources, reducing plant waste, investing in organic farms and new employee transportation plans... you think you're pretty special, don't you cereal box.

Time to try it. I open the box and notice that they could have made the box even smaller. I try the granola. It's delicious. And it does give me energy! I finish it in a couple of days. The next time I go to the store I buy another box.

Here's the bottom line, cereal box. You had me at peanut butter. I bought you before I new how special you were. I don't care if you're saving the planet (well I do, but that's not what's going to get me to buy you), if you compliment me, or even if you insult me. All I care about is if you taste good. That's what's going to get me to buy you again and again.

That being said, I do aspire to be the kind of person my cereal box thinks I am.