I'm just sayin'

When we first moved to Eugene, I really liked it for all of it's beauty and eccentricities. But after a few months of not being able to find a good job, I began to get a little down on myself.

At least it was still pretty warm compared to UT and I could keep myself busy by spending a lot of time outside.

Then the rain came.

And I swear it didn't stop until July!

And everything I started out liking about Eugene, I began to truly hate. The running trails were all muddy, the people were crazy, the Farmer's Market was too weird...

I felt pretty bad in this place. So bad that I found something to hate about almost everything here. The grass was too green! I wanted to get out of Eugene and never come back!

Then I had our baby. It finally stopped raining, it was nice and summery warm outside, and I was a very busy lady. I was starting to be much happier again.

I was a little worried for the rainy season again this year. Would I be afraid to go outside for fear of a downpour that comes out of nowhere soaking me like it did so many times last year? Would I be forced to be a hermit? Would I go crazy playing with baby toys all day? Would I feel trapped and alone again?

The rain started months ago, and you know what? I've been too busy doing the best, most fun job in the world to notice it.

Instead, I've been noticing the things I liked about this place before.

Like how oftentimes there are nice days in January where I can go for walks with my girls.

Like how there are cool things here that I've only seen in the movie Fern Gully.

Like how spring is already starting to show it's face.

Like how I've realized that it wasn't the weather, the drivers, the people, or the fact that my dog got fleas that made me hate it here.

It was ME.

Yesterday Alec told me how nice it is for him to be able to call me during a break from school or work and not have to be worried about what he's going to hear on the other end. I'd sometimes be crying, I'd tell him I wanted to move, I'd complain about everything.

My first thought was:

Yes. that was a sucky time for me and I'm so glad it's over!

And then I thought:

Wow. How horrible it must have been to be you and have to hear that. I'd be nervous and scared to call me too!

But he still called me everyday, sometimes several times.

I learned so much about myself last year. A lot of it really ugly... I also learned things about my husband I never would have if things had gone more smoothly. All of it wonderful.

I've never thought much of the New Year's holiday before, but when that day came, I was excited to leave 2010 behind and begin fresh, with a whole new attitude.

Starting with liking where I live.

Did I mention it's in the mid-fifties and sunny here today? I'm just sayin'

ps: Happy birthday Ken!